'Survivor' Sets Summer TV Ratings Record. I guess 51 million people tuned in last night, making it the most watched show this year aside from the Superbowl. I didn't watch, but I love that the competition turned so ugly, was nearly won by a shit-talking geezer, and ended up being won by a scheming "fat naked fag" (I also love that CBS let those kinds of comments air. Really. It warms my heart - in a free speech kind of way.) It seems like an extremely not TV-friendly and not particularly good-looking group - unlike the suck that is Road Rules and The Real World. Now that it's over, is anyone going to start watching Big Brother?

Thousands Greet Brad Pitt at London Film Premiere. Hollywood star Brad Pitt was greeted by thousands of fans at the London premiere of his film ``Snatch,'' prompting police to whisk him into the cinema to prevent a dangerous crush. Ha. His movie is called Snatch. That's some funny shit. I guess I could make a joke about what the sequel is going to be called, but it's almost too obvious... But I'll make it anyway. Twat? Snatch Harder? I Still Know What Your Snatch Did Last Summer?

Brenda Blethyn Lights Up in 'Saving Grace'. The Oscar nominee for "Little Voice," and "Secrets and Lies," returns to the big screen in ``Saving Grace,'' a comedy about a deep-in-debt widow who grows and sells pot to make ends meet. "Sweetie, I think you must have left your bong down the offices!"

Alec Baldwin Bows Gotham 'Voices!' Series. Alec Baldwin will produce and star in a series of play readings in the 2000-01 season at New York's City Center. Man, I've liked Alec Baldwin since Beetlejuice. I've been a big fan in a few movies and have just heard wonderful things about him as a person and with his dedication to the theatre and his unfettered excitement when Kim won her undeserved Oscar (it's one of my favorite photos of Love ever, the look on his face as her name was announced), and yet, homeboy just has something that makes you not want to like him, despite all that. I find it so tough being an Alec Baldwin fan, I don't even go to his movies anymore. He just constantly ruins everything.

Hip Hop TV Award Program Canceled After Fights. Police had to cancel taping of a the Source Award show on Tuesday night after fights broke out backstage and in the hall of the Pasadena Civic Auditorium, witnesses said. It's sad for me to watch the rap world break down, but with creativity at an all time low, I'm not surprised by shit like this. We've progressed so little in terms of content and subject matter of popular hip hop in the last 10 years. Booty and violence and money. Wait, that doesn't sound so bad.

'Happy' Anne Heche Starts Filming in Toronto. Actress Anne Heche, who was hospitalized briefly in California on Sunday following the breakup of her lesbian relationship, is in good health and starting work on a new movie in Toronto, the film's producer said on Wednesday. I love that the reporter went out of his way to say, "lesbian relationship." That's so fucking funny. Anne wandered into someone's house in Fresno, California, babbling. A friend said it was not drugs but "sunstroke". Yes, and when Robert Downey Jr. fell asleep in a neighbor's child's bed, it was due to "heartburn". And Matthew Perry crashed his car into someone's house last month because he "thought he saw a woodchuck."

Robin Williams will tickle ivories on "Liberace" film. Yup, Mork will play Liberace in a bio-pic. I think the casting is perfect. They're both formerly charming performers who grew increasingly annoying and self-parodying with each passing year. Good job.

*THREE WAY ACTION*
(The Forum)

Talk about everything under your mom, including the trades.

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The Anna Nicole Smith Happy Song Corner

 
 
I heat up, I can't cool down. You got me spinnin' round and round. Round and round and round it goes. Where it stops nobody knows. Every time you call my name, I heat up like a burnin' flame. Burnin' flame full of desire. Kiss me baby, let the fire get higher. Abra-abra-cadabra. I want to reach out and grab ya. Abra-abra-cadabra. Abracadabra. You make me hot, you make me sigh. You make me laugh, you make me cry. Keep me burnin' for your love. With the touch of a velvet glove. Abra-abra-cadabra. I want to reach out and grab ya. Abra-abra-cadabra. Abracadabra. I feel the magic in your caress. I feel magic when I touch your dress. Silk and satin, leather and lace. Black panties with an angel's face. I see magic in your eyes. I hear the magic in your sighs. Just when I think I'm gonna get away. I hear those words that you always say... speaking of which. Abra-abra-cadabra I want to reach out and grab ya Abra-abra-cadabra Abracadabra... speaking of which. Abra-cababbarra! I made my son disappear, y'all. It's not my fault. I caught the lil' fucker trying on my make-up. I'm serious. I didn't mean to yell at him, but he was using my favorite lipstick.
 
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