Hey bitches. Yeah, I disappeared there for a week with no warning. I've never done that before. Makes me more mysterious and alluring, no? No? Shit. In actuality, I was just sort of bored, boring, and uninspired. I'm in the middle of a rewrite and still working and am ending up going out most nights. Makes it hard to balance things. I'm pretty tired at work and my mind is elsewhere and I'm either shopping online for Christmas gifts (makes my life so much easier, I tell you) or dealing with the forum (I had my first flamewars, resulting in someone even quitting -- huzzah!) or working on a writing assignment. I also do a lot of staring into space and listening to the same song over and over and trying to remember if I'm on my third or fourth diet coke. I forget lunch most days -- ah, today. No lunch. See? Forgot. I make a lot of phone calls and then tell people I don't want to talk about the two subjects I usually end up talking about, my personal life and my career -- both of which I don't really feel comfortable talking a whole lot about here for various reasons -- so we shoot the shit about whatever and then I get tired and go chew gum instead. I'm pretty funny these days, though. Okay, so maybe not on paper.

On Saturday night on my way to a party, my car blew up. Sorta. And late that night after the party as I walked through the hills to get it and try to make it home, I wrote a new version of Creed's terrible, With Arms Wide Open:

Well I just smelled
The smoke tonight
It seems my car
Ain't working right
I close my eyes
It's just no good
As thick black smoke
Pours from my hood

My car's so broken
Up above Sunset
I walk away and cuss
I'll have to take the bus
My car's so broken

Well I don't know
If I'm resigned
To have to shop
For a new ride
I take a breath
Put keys in the slot
Start the drive home
Limping past Pink Dot

My car's so broken
It's the morning now
Welcome to this shop
You I'll have to drop off
My car's so broken

Now everything has changed
I'm having fun
With this new rental car
My car's so broken

If I had just one wish
Yes, I would take stock
I hope it's not my fear:
That it's the engine block
It could be just a hose
Or the water pump
Then I'll no more say
My car's so broken

My car's so broken
I've had it so long
So many memories
Will I get back the keys?
My car's so broken
We're both broken

Todd is back from his honeymoon which makes me exceedingly happy. He was sick most of 2000 and couldn't drink and got tired easily. Well, now he's better and we just made our first "appointment" to do what we do: go to a bar and talk. I really couldn't be happier. I love my female friends and indeed spend a shitload of time with them, but I realize now that I've probably been getting a bit too much estrogen in my breathing air. Yesterday I couldn't leave the house because of the jacked car, so I spent most of the day when I wasn't madly working on this rewrite, lying on the couch, watching football, and talking to my guy friends on the phone about the football games we were watching. I quite needed that. It's a weird thing not to leave your house. I got up around noon, made coffee, worked, cleaned, worked, walked around, shot darts, played with the cat, watched TV, ate an apple, talked on the phone, worked some more, talked on the phone some more, walked to the store, ordered dinner since I hadn't eaten all day, watched TV, worked, worked-out for an hour, talked on the phone, went to the store again for Gatorade, worked, then watched part of the same ridiculously boring French movie I watched on Friday night, and then went to sleep. It sounds boring but it was a very necessarily boring day.

I'm trying to think what y'all missed out on, but not much. Some drinks with people. Some coffees with people. Ooh, on Friday I was with a friend at my place and when she left I ended up working until 2am. Well, my neighbor across the street is the actress Joey Lauren Adams, and she was having a party. Let me just say that Joey Lauren Adams has the worst taste in music, y'all. Like, terrible. I nearly called the cops at 2am, not because she was keeping me up, but because I couldn't stand to hear Sweet Home Alabama one more time. Finally, her squeaky-ass stopped. I was working on my latest $treet recap. It's a bittersweet occasion because, in case you hadn't heard, the show was canceled by Fox on Thursday. So no more $treet -- next week is the last one. I'm scared what show Wing will find for me next, but really, it couldn't be much worse, could it?

Ironically, after being a working-late loser on Friday, on Saturday I had four parties to go to. I ended up not leaving my house until 11 and so I only went to two of the parties. They were both pretty fun -- though the costume party I went to, by the time I showed up, everyone had changed. It's my fault for showing up at 1am. But I'm just hip like that.

One cool thing that happened on Saturday: I had coffee down on Melrose with Msaada, from Road Rules. She read and enjoyed my recaps (if only because we never talked shit about her) and wanted to meet. So we did. She's insanely nice and down to earth. I don't really get rattled meeting celebrities anymore, but I had just spent months watching her on TV every week so closely, that it took me a few minutes to get my bearings. Anyway, I talked about the meeting a bit on the MBTV Road Rules boards, plus we're going to do an interview soon for that site. Suffice it to say, she was very gracious to meet with me and couldn't have been more nice and friendly and fun to talk to. And yes, I do rock like that.

So I'm kinda nervous as tomorrow night an evening of three one-act plays I wrote opens. I was supposed to go to dress yesterday but I couldn't get there, so I might go tonight. Or I might just wait and go tomorrow, as anything I say tonight would be too little too late. It's an odd feeling that I can't yet understand, watching your own stuff. I know I'm going to be no fun for my date who is going to have to deal with a lot of mumbling and arm-grabs during the opening tomorrow. At least she knows nothing about the theatre. But then again, maybe it'll be great. I've liked most of what I've seen. OK, I'm rambling folks, so obviously I'm nervous. There.

My pick for topic of the day at Three Way Action:

Amazon wishlists. I have one, I'm not posting it this year as I did last year, and as a lot of people are doing. Stupidly now, it makes me uncomfortable for some reason. However, I'm not against it. Some people are. Very much so.
What do you think?

---

The Robert Downey Jr. Happy Song Corner

 
 
Dig if you will the picture, of you and I engaged in a kiss. The sweat of your body covers me. Can you my darling? Can you picture this? Dream if you can a courtyard. An ocean of violets in bloom. Animals strike curious poses. They feel the heat, the heat between me and you. How can you just leave me standing? Alone in a world that's so cold? Maybe I'm just too demanding. Maybe I'm just like my father, too bold. Maybe I'm just like my mother, she's never satisfied. Why do we scream at each other? This is what it sounds like, when doves cry. Touch if you will my stomach. Feel how it trembles inside. You've got the butterflies all tied up. Don't make me chase you, even doves have pride. How can you just leave me standing? Alone in a world so cold? Maybe I'm just too demanding. Maybe I'm just like my father, too bold. Maybe I'm just like my mother, she's never satisfied. Why do we scream at each other? This is what it sounds like, when doves cry... speaking of which. Why do we scream at each other? Huh? Listen, listen. You're a good maid, I'm sure... Esmerelda. That's your name? Good. Great. I'm an actor, see, and I just... I need you to go down and restock the mini-bar for me. Soon. Can you do that? Stop yelling. Stop yelling, I can't- Oh, you want me to put pants on. Right. OK. Sorry.
 
  home   back   index   next   howl