steely dan apologizes


Late last night after winning the Grammy for Album of the Year, Steely Dan released a new version of their hit, "Hey Nineteen."

Way back when in 1980.
We were a band,
cool and aloof.
Now us old rockers,
so weird and ugly:
We're nominated?
We thought it was a goof.

Hey Grammys.
Our album's nothing special.
It's really not that good.
Please take this trophy,
pass it right on down.

Hey Grammys,
that's Radiohead.
Their disc was awesome and so was Beck's.
Hard times befallen
the voting body.
They vote for Henley!
It really does perplex.

Hey Grammys.
We're happy just to have been here.
Did not earn this at all.
Please take this thing back,
look at U2's frown.

The reporters.
We have to talk to them?
Man, tonight's an embarrassing thing.

Elsewhere…

I got the meanest email I've ever received today. I guess this guy was reading an old entry where I talked about my cell phone contract ending without my knowing it and getting stuck with a huge bill. It was over seven months ago. I wrote him back saying that I was going to post his email address (I also told him to suck my ass.) Here is it:

"here's a suggestion--would you like some cheese with your whine, you tedious little shit. every-fucking-one knows that having a mobile phone is always going to be more expensive than a land line phone. you should have studied every single line of the fine print on the contract before signing. i guess for you whining is a great way to cover up you own stupidity. Have a nice day"

Peter Brun is the guy's name. (Oh, and this from Sara -- idiotic dumbfuck that he is, using his work email to send hate mail, gave easy access to finding his company website, complete with his photo, and work phone number up in Minnesota. Stupid-ass. Hey Peter, nice tie, moron.)

Finally…

…Pamie and I wrote a piece on Inside The Actor's Studio. It's up over at Squishy. It's long and funny. Just like your mom.

The Robert Downey Jr. Happy Song Corner

 
 

I am a patient boy, I wait, I wait, I wait. My time is like water down a drain. Everybody's moving, everything is moving. Please don't leave me to remain in the waiting room. I don't want the news. I'm not a part of it. I don't want the news. I have no use for it. Sitting outside of town everybody's always down because, they can't get up. But I don't sit idly by. I'm planning a big surprise. I'm gonna fight for what I want to be. I won't make the same mistakes, because I know how much time that wastes. Function is the key in the waiting room...speaking of which. I'm not gonna going to sit idly by while you steal my creamed corn. I mean, really. I've eaten caviar off the naked buttocks Winona Fucking Ryder. I'm not going to let you just- Ow.
 
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